A Knight's Battlecry

Alas! I am currently at this point in my life
where I am technically drained, exhausted and lifeless.
With all of the situations I am facing (whether I chose it or not),
the flame of love within me is constantly dying.
I saw the need of igniting it again,
that I may learn to share, to love and to live again.

All of my defenses, I started to tear down.
Little by little, I dismantled the steel shards that cover my heart,
exposing it again to feeling emotions, feeling weak in love,
feeling how is it to love and to be loved. I chose it,
because I wanted to be human.

And thus I tried to revive that flame within me, but apparently,
it is leading me to another path,
a path that I never thought of choosing.
Now I am in a battle, a warfare where I combat hand-to-hand with myself.
My reason against my emotions.

And as this war continues within me,
it seems that I find myself dying,
taking even the very last breath that I have..almost.
Still, I am trying to fight, struggling for survival,
that I may do what I should do.

But this concept of being trapped between choosing the right side:
emotion over reason, or the other way around.
I am tired of holding on to my sword.
Tired of choosing.
Tired of thinking.
I wave farewell, though forever, it doesn't mean.